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Author Topic: MAKING YOUR CHRISTMAS CAKE GO WITH A BANG.  (Read 494 times)
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Faye Yerbury
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« on: December 19, 2011, 06:11:45 PM »

This wonderful recipe came via a friend of mine and I thought everyone would enjoy making the cake.
READ ON Smiley


Ingredients:
 
* 6 cups flour
* 1 Block butter
* 1 cup of water
* 1 tsp baking soda
* 1 cup of sugar
* 1 tsp salt
* 1 cup of brown sugar
* Lemon juice
* 4 large eggs
* Nuts
* 2 bottle wine
* 2 cups of dried fruit
 
Sample the wine to check quality.  Take a large bowl, check the wine again.
 
To be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Repeat.  Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.  Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the wine is still OK.  Try another cup... Just in case. 
 
Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 eggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.  Pick the frigging fruit up off floor. Mix on the turner.  If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver.
 
Sample the wine to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt.  Or something. Check the wine. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.  Add one table.  Add a spoon of sugar, or some fink.  Whatever you can find.  Greash the oven.  Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.
 
Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window.  Finish the wine and wipe counter with the cat.
 
Take a taxi to Tesco and buy cake.
 
Bingle Jells

Have a lovely Christmas everyone.
Regards Faye.x
 laugh
 
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Robert Newman
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« Reply #1 on: December 19, 2011, 06:50:20 PM »

Excellent, "wipe counter with cat".

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Bev Downie
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« Reply #2 on: December 19, 2011, 07:24:41 PM »

I'd have to stop at point one and then go and buy a cake!
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John Myall
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« Reply #3 on: December 19, 2011, 08:52:59 PM »

Can't be arsed with all that. Just get a bottle of wine!!

 partybeer
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The Landlord
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« Reply #4 on: December 19, 2011, 08:55:01 PM »

 Grin Grin Grin Grin Nice one Faye  partybeer partybeer partybeer
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Another 8 months of Football
Ian Rose
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« Reply #5 on: December 19, 2011, 11:12:45 PM »

It was either great or I am sad but I laughed so much I had tears running down my face. 

Or it could be they've upped my medication  Grin
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I aim to give more than I receive and spend so much time on improving myself that I don't have time to notice the imperfection of others.
Alan Hutchison
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« Reply #6 on: December 19, 2011, 11:21:51 PM »

Trevor will not be amused LOL
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Jane Allan
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« Reply #7 on: December 20, 2011, 09:32:52 AM »

Love it.  Very funny.  laugh
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Agachi
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« Reply #8 on: December 20, 2011, 06:38:11 PM »

  partybeer
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Stephen Harrison
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« Reply #9 on: December 21, 2011, 02:13:05 PM »

Nice one. Hic partybeer
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Faye Yerbury
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« Reply #10 on: December 21, 2011, 03:47:51 PM »

Trevor will not be amused LOL

I am going to get Trevor to make it.........
.........Well I will reword that....TRY. Kiss
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Alan Hutchison
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« Reply #11 on: December 23, 2011, 11:10:40 PM »

Trevor will not be amused LOL

I am going to get Trevor to make it.........
.........Well I will reword that....TRY. Kiss

We'll need picture Faye or it never happened  Wink
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Mike_Williams
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« Reply #12 on: December 28, 2011, 06:48:32 AM »

Just so long as he keeps his clothes on.............
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